“Deathwish”

Posted on May 10, 2016 by Badge415

You never know how people are going to react at traffic accidents. Some people fall apart even though the damage was minor and others take it in stride.

Every once in a while a person will knock down a pole and take it like a champ. You have to admire a guy who can walk away after destroying his truck and then joke about it.

A few weeks ago I met a guy like that. He had turned too fast and ran off the road. He struck the curb, a street sign and knocked down a light pole in a gas station parking lot.

His truck ended up in the bushes and caused a minor power outage. He stood there like nothing happened when I arrived.

While I was talking with him I noticed his shirt said, “Deathwish” on the back. I pointed out to him that he drove like he had a death wish and then asked, “Can I get a picture of your shirt?”

He was more that happy to pose for a picture and turned around for me. He was such a good sport about the crash and the shirt, I figured I’d ask him for another picture.

“How about one in front of your truck where we can see your shirt?” It didn’t hurt to ask.

“Sure,” he replied. He turned his back so we could see his shirt and gave me a thumbs up. The thumbs up was the best. Combined with the shirt and the crashed truck, it was priceless.

When it was time to leave he shrugged his shoulders and said, “I guess I’ll go look for a new car tomorrow.”

Where’s the steering wheel?

Posted on May 10, 2016 by Badge415

The other night I was sent a call on the eastern end of the city. I was near the freeway, so I decided to jump on and get there faster. I took the on ramp and started to accelerate.

I was up to freeway speed in a matter of seconds and looked into my mirror as I prepared to merge into traffic. Just as I looked, I heard the sound of skidding off to my left.

I turned my head just in time to see a car blowing by me as it was trying to slow down. Its brake lights were shining brightly like a lighthouse on a rocky coast on a foggy night for passing ships to see.

The car decelerated to 70 miles per hour in a matter of seconds.

It’s amazing how that works when you pass a police car like that. Of course, he needed to be stopped. I’m sure everyone else on the freeway wanted to see it too.

I turned on my lights as red and blue reflected off of everything around me. In defeat, the car pulled over and stopped on the shoulder. After the car stopped, I walked up on the passenger side as I used my flashlight to illuminate the inside.

I looked into the car trying to see the driver’s hands. That’s when I noticed there was no steering wheel. It just didn’t look right. How was he steering the car? I actually had to do a double take.

That’s when I saw a steering wheel on the passenger seat. That didn’t look right either. It was like a Twilight Zone car stop.

I asked, “Why is your steering wheel there,” as I pointed to the passenger seat.

“I wanted to show you I wasn’t going to take off,” he replied.

That actually made me laugh.

I never even thought of that one before. I took out my phone and told him, “I’m taking a picture of that.” I instantly knew he’d make the blog.

You just can’t make this stuff up.

“Dad! Daddy! Dad!”

Posted on April 29, 2016 by Badge415

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“I’m going to drop you off at school today with no shirt on.”

With a firm voice my 11 year old daughter said, “Please don’t.”

It was at this point, I thought I’d have some fun at her expense. I grabbed my keys and went to the garage without a shirt on. Once the garage door was up, I got in my car and waited with anticipation for her to come out.

About 30 seconds later my daughter stormed into the garage with a scowl on her face as he petite body carried a large backpack. With a serious and determined look she opened the passenger door and tossed a shirt at me as she said, “Put that on.”

The shirt landed on my lap and I tossed it back as she closed the door. I was going to put it on, but my little joke was just too good to pass up now. Of course, she tried to give me the shirt again, but I refused to take It. That’s when I put the car in reverse and started to back up.

“DAD! DADDY! DAD!”

I pulled onto the street and started heading toward school with my daughter in a panic because I was going to embarrass her. I got 50 yards down the road and couldn’t hold it in anymore as I started laughing. I finally had to pull over so I could put my shirt on.

With her arms crossed, my daughter sat there with eyes that could throw darts. I kept laughing, but she wasn’t amused. With my shirt finally on, we headed to school as I tried to get her to laugh.

She eventually cracked a smile, but she fought to keep it in.

I pulled into the school parking lot and I asked, “Why couldn’t I drop you off without my shirt on?”

“Because it’s embarrassing!”

She also hates it when I suddenly blast 80s music as she steps out of the car at school too! Maybe one day she’ll torture her kids like this because of all the fun I had with her.

My job is to keep them on their toes and to have a little fun at the same time.

Where’s my mommy?

Posted on April 24, 2016 by Badge415

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The call came out as a felony hit and run involving a pedestrian with witnesses following the suspect. Dispatch updated the suspect’s location as it continued westbound on a major highway.

A few minutes later we caught up to the suspect and stopped the vehicle in a parking lot. After the interviews, we learned that the victim was transported to the hospital because her foot was run over. The suspect was arrested for felony hit and run and placed in the back of a police car. She also was driving on a suspended license.

This wasn’t the typical hit and run story though. This one had a bit of a twist to it.

What made this one a little different were the passengers in the suspect vehicle. They weren’t a bunch of hoodlums or gang members. They were the driver’s 6 and 3 year old daughters.

After mom was arrested, I walked up to the vehicle so I could get her purse and cell phone for her. There was an officer standing at the car wth the children. The 6 year old seemed to be having a good time taking with the officer.

I looked at her and asked, “Where’s mummy’s purse and cell phone?”

“Right there, ” she said as she pointed to the front seat.

“Thanks,” I replied.

I was about to walk away when she asked, “Where’s my mommy?”

I was kind of hoping to avoid that one. What do you tell a 6 year old? You can’t just say, “Mommy went to jail because she ran over a woman.”

Instead, I went with, “Mommy is talking to a police officer.”

“OK.”

“Your daddy is coming,” I said.

“My daddy is coming?”

“He’ll be here soon.”

“OK.”

I took the purse and phone to the patrol car and gave them to the officer. He then drove her to jail.

A few minutes later I walked by the vehicle and the little girl asked, “Where’s my mommy?”

“She’s talking with the officer at the police station,” I replied.

“Ok. Do you have kids?’ she asked. It was the cutest thing.

“I do. Do you want to see a picture of them?”

“Yeah,” she said with a smile.

I took my phone out and showed her a picture of my kids. The little girl looked at my daughter and said, “She’s pretty!”

You can’t beat a child’s innocence.

Spring cleaning

Posted on April 21, 2016 by Badge415

A few weeks ago, I was driving down the street when I saw an SUV parked on the side of the road with a bunch of clothes piled on the hood. This wasn’t something you see every day and I had to stop to see what the story was.

There was a woman in the passenger seat who got out and said hi as I walked up. I asked her, “What’s up with the clothes?”

“This isn’t my car,” she said. “It’s my friend’s car and she’s been doing some organizing.”

“She’s organizing on the hood of the car?” I asked. I took a quick look inside the vehicle and noticed the backseat was also piled high with clothes.

“Yeah. She’ll be right back. She just went down the street.”

I engaged the woman in small talk as she told me about being homeless for the last five years. She was 25 years old, blonde, thin and had major acne. She was quite entertaining and was more than happy to talk about life on the street.

“I used to live in my car in San Francisco. It was so stuffed with clothes I had to sleep like a “human Tetris.”

Not human Tetris. The real deal.

That was downright funny and I burst out with laughter because I played Tetris back in the day and knew exactly what she was talking about.

That’s when a woman and a man walked up. She had bright red hair and was about 45 years old. She was smoking a cigarette and was the vehicle’s owner.

“I just stopped by to take a picture of all the clothes,” I said as I pulled out my iPad. “Do you want to be in the picture too?”

The woman laughed as she said, “Oh God, no!” She then retreated behind the SUV because she was camera shy.

After I took the picture, the woman with red hair started folding clothes as she said, “I’m doing some organizing.”

“I heard,” I replied.

She went on to tell me how she had been giving clothes away as she tried to make room in her car. She held up clothes and looked at them like she was in a department store. Once she was satisfied, she folded them and made piles on the hood. It was actually funny to watch.

I finally had to say goodbye because I had another call to go to. They seemed happy I had stopped by to talk and waved as I drove away. The first woman even told me to have a safe night.

It’s always fun to stop and talk with people. Everyone one has a story. They just need the right person to tell it to. Plus, I would’ve never heard the phrase “human Tetris” unless I stopped.

You just never know what you’re going to see out on patrol.

We’re toxic together

Posted on April 13, 2016 by Badge415

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The other night I responded to a restraining order violation call involving a man and a woman, who have a child together. When I got there I saw them speaking to officers. The man, who was Caucasian and his 30s, was sitting on the bumper of a patrol car. His shirt was dirty and his hair was unkempt.

I stood there in awe as I listened to him ramble about all kinds of things. It was both funny and sad to know he was reproducing. I didn’t want to stand too close to him in case some of his dumbness tried to rub off onto me.

One of the first things he said was, “My record is a mile long.”

I had not doubt about that as I listened to him.

The subject of domestic violence came up and he had plenty to talk about since he’d been arrested before. He was talking to a cop when he said, “OJ fucked it up for everyone.”

I couldn’t help but laugh when I heard that. I wasn’t laughing at what happened with OJ Simpson. I was laughing because this guy said it in the middle of a domestic violence restraining order investigation.

The subject turned to his relationship with his ex and what she used to do for a living when he said, “She was a prostitute. It runs in her family.”

Who says that to a bunch of strangers? Just hilarious.

I then made small talk with the victim. “How long were you together?” I asked.

“For 17 years. We’re toxic together.”

She went on to tell me all kinds of stories about their drug use, their prison time and an 18 year daughter she gave up along time ago.

After he was arrested, the woman said she was going to call a friend for a ride. She walked to a fast food restaurant to wait. As she walked away, I wondered how much damage had been caused to their child by the “toxic” relationship they share.

Unfortunately, the poor kid doesn’t have a chance.

Happy retirement Deputy

Posted on April 6, 2016 by Badge415

In May of 1990, my uncle Eddie (Ed to most people) graduated from the academy and became a Deputy with the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department. I missed his graduation because I had a final to take at school.

I remember the graduation party at my grandmother’s house after I finished my test at school. Eddie was wearing his uniform with his shiny deputy star on his chest as he posed for pictures with us. He was 4 years older than me and the first cop in our family. I was proud of him.

After he started working, he encouraged me to be a deputy. One day I went over his house and we had a long talk about police work. That conversation, along with another with a family neighbor, who worked for LAPD, pushed me toward a police career.

I can still picture where I sat in his house and how I left knowing the seed was planted for a career in law enforcement. That seed was later watered during a ride along with the Los Angeles Police Department that was set up through my mom’s neighbor.

I graduated from the Orange County Sheriff’s academy about 1 1/2 years after that conversation at Eddie’s house. It was a great moment to stand next to Eddie, who was there in his uniform. It was actually the only time we were in uniform together.

Now, after almost 26 years as a deputy, Eddie retired. It’s hard to believe he’s now a “retired cop.” Knowing he’s retired means I’m really not that far behind him, which is weird. I still have a ways to go, but the sun will set on my police career before I know it just like it did for Eddie.

Congrats on your retirement. Now, let’s go back to Maui.

“It was.09, but I was fine”

Posted on April 5, 2016 by Badge415

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The other night I followed up an officer on a car stop after a guy had made a right turn on a red light without stopping. When I arrived the officer said, “He’s suspended for DUI. I’m going to get him out.”

The officer contacted the driver and asked him to step out of the car. He patted him down for weapons and told him sit down on the curb. The officer then did an inventory search of the vehicle because it was going to get impounded.

I looked at the driver and asked, “Did you crash or did you get stopped when you got arrested?”

“I got stopped.”

“What was your B.A.C.?”

“It was .09, but I was fine.”

“Well, you obviously weren’t fine since you were arrested.” I said. “Being DUI doesn’t mean you’re falling down drunk. It means you were impaired and above the limit.”

“What’s going to happen to my car?”

“It’s getting impounded.”

“For how long?”

“For 30 days.”

“Can someone pick up the car?” he asked.

“No.” I told him.

“Why?”

“You’re license is suspended and you ran a red light. You knew you weren’t supposed to drive, right?”

“Yeah.”

I was a little surprised he said he was fine after being a .09% B.A.C. and getting arrested. He just didn’t get it yet. Maybe one day he will. I’m sure he knows everything at 21 years old.

A day in court

Posted on April 4, 2016 by Badge415

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I’m sitting in the hallway at the courthouse waiting to testify on a possession of burglary tools case. Of course, there’s nothing better than sitting in court on my day off. How did I get called for this?

Here’s the funny part. It’s not even my case. It turned out I handled a call last year when this knucklehead crashed into a parked car and a wall.

It wasn’t a normal crash though. This was a DUI on drugs with a hit and run, who was in possession of burglary tools and who was on parole. After the crash he took off with dogs and people chasing him. You can’t make that stuff up.

Dogs and a crowd! That’s right out of a movie.

He must’ve been happy when the cops caught him. It wasn’t his best day.

I’m sure an experience like that would make the average person never want to get in trouble again , right? Well, not this guy.

You might be shocked to hear this, but this mental midget got out of jail after less than 9 months and got arrested again for being in possession of burglary tools? Who does that?

Oh that’s right, some people never learn.

Time to head back into court.

The crazy stuff that flies out of cars

Posted on March 28, 2016 by Badge415

This cross was an errie sight in the middle of the street after one rollover hit and run crash.

You never know what you’re going to find in the street after a car has rolled over a couple of times.

The other night I was walking around a parking lot after a car had rolled over after hitting the side of a building. There was broken glass, car parts and fluid everywhere.

The damage told a story of a wild ride that would’ve looked spectacular had there been a video camera handy. Even the tow truck driver told me this was probably the worst car crash he had ever seen.

As he cleaned up, I walked around the path of destruction and saw a box of condoms lying among the debris. It was the wrong protection in this situation. The driver really needed a helmet instead.

While I was still at the scene, I thought about past collisions and all of the stuff that has come out of cars and been in the street when I got there. I wished I had taken more pictures.

I have no idea how the ice cream and the peppers got together. Notice the plastic bag stuck in the door. You never know what you’re going to see at a crash.

So far the craziest thing that has ever come out of a car was a guy’s finger. Yes, a finger. The driver was missing his finger after rolling over a couple of times. We later found it stuck to the pavement among the debris. It brings new meaning to the phrase, “He gave me the finger.”

You just can’t make this stuff up.