Where am I going?

Posted on April 19, 2016 by Badge415

“729, 211,” the dispatcher said as she called us for a crash.

“729,” I repeated back.

“729, 211. 902T, 2900 W. Lost Street. One vehicle is in front of the apartment complex.” (I made the Lost Street name up)

“729, 10-4.”

Here’s the problem. I wasn’t paying attention to what she said. I was going 40 mph with both windows down when the call went out. For some reason I thought she sent me to 2900 “East” Lost Street.

I was in the northern end of the city so I jumped on the freeway and headed eastbound. I took another freeway and went southbound, which put me in the “correct” location in less than five minutes.

I must’ve been day dreaming because I pulled up to the apartment complex at 2400 E. Lost Street for some reason. I don’t know what I was thinking.

There were no crashed cars there so I asked the dispatcher to do a recall. I parked and waited.

After a few minutes, the dispatcher came back on the radio and told me the RP (reporting party) was still waiting at the location.

I glanced up at the apartment complex and realized I was in the wrong spot. I typed a quick message to the dispatcher, telling her what I had done. I also said, “By the way, they’re not here either.”

I hauled butt to 2900 E. Lost Street and still couldn’t find them. What the heck? That’s when I paid attention to the call on my computer screen for the first time. Oops!!!

No wonder they weren’t there. The call was at 2900 West Lost Street. My GPS must’ve looked hilarious on the dispatcher’s screen going in all different directions.

After I finally pulled my head out of my ass, I was able to find the correct location on the other end of the city. Of course, it seemed like I got every red light on the way there. Oh well. What can you do?

It’s not the first time I went the wrong way and it certainly won’t be the last… You just have to be able to laugh at yourself.

S%#t happens.

“Is traffic available?”

Posted on April 14, 2016 by Badge415

“Is traffic available?”

Sometimes I’ll be busy on something at work when a crash goes out and a patrol officer gets dispatched to it. Most of the time the officer answers the radio for the call and responds to it.

Every once in a while a patrol cop will get the call and the first thing out of their mouth is, “Is traffic available?”

Obviously the traffic unit wasn’t available. If they had been the dispatcher would’ve sent them in the first place. It’s not like the dispatcher was trying to hide the traffic unit and not use them. Of course, they would’ve sent them had they been available.

Just go to the call.

There could be any number of reasons why I or my partners weren’t available at the time.

I could’ve been sitting on the toilet playing Candy Crush. I could’ve been on another call, or on a car stop (not too often). I might’ve been report writing or on lunch.

The other night I was working a patrol spot instead of my normal traffic shift when I did something I’ve always wanted to do. I was driving down the street when I heard my patrol call sign called out over the radio by dispatch.

“326.”

“326.” I replied.

“326 and unit to back. 901, vehicle into a block wall,” the dispatcher said. 901 was the radio code for traffic collision with unknown injuries.

I keyed the microphone and said, “326. Is traffic available?”

There was a long pause as I silently chuckled to myself. I wondered if anyone noticed how silly it sounded. The dispatcher came back with the best reply ever when she said, “784 will be en route shortly.”

I actually laughed even more and smiled when I heard that. For those that don’t know, my call sign was 784 for 15 years before it was changed to 729. I was impressed by her quick-witted reply and it instantly put me in a good mood.

Right after that my computer blew up with “LOL” messages about the radio traffic. It was truly a funny moment that I’ll never forget.

Thanks for the radio traffic K.G.

We’re toxic together

Posted on April 13, 2016 by Badge415

_DSC4559-2
The other night I responded to a restraining order violation call involving a man and a woman, who have a child together. When I got there I saw them speaking to officers. The man, who was Caucasian and his 30s, was sitting on the bumper of a patrol car. His shirt was dirty and his hair was unkempt.

I stood there in awe as I listened to him ramble about all kinds of things. It was both funny and sad to know he was reproducing. I didn’t want to stand too close to him in case some of his dumbness tried to rub off onto me.

One of the first things he said was, “My record is a mile long.”

I had not doubt about that as I listened to him.

The subject of domestic violence came up and he had plenty to talk about since he’d been arrested before. He was talking to a cop when he said, “OJ fucked it up for everyone.”

I couldn’t help but laugh when I heard that. I wasn’t laughing at what happened with OJ Simpson. I was laughing because this guy said it in the middle of a domestic violence restraining order investigation.

The subject turned to his relationship with his ex and what she used to do for a living when he said, “She was a prostitute. It runs in her family.”

Who says that to a bunch of strangers? Just hilarious.

I then made small talk with the victim. “How long were you together?” I asked.

“For 17 years. We’re toxic together.”

She went on to tell me all kinds of stories about their drug use, their prison time and an 18 year daughter she gave up along time ago.

After he was arrested, the woman said she was going to call a friend for a ride. She walked to a fast food restaurant to wait. As she walked away, I wondered how much damage had been caused to their child by the “toxic” relationship they share.

Unfortunately, the poor kid doesn’t have a chance.

You never know when you’ll need duct tape

Posted on April 11, 2016 by Badge415

Last week I was at a traffic collision where a tow truck changed lanes and hit a car. When I got there the ambulance was leaving with the car’s passenger.

The vehicles were in the middle of the street and there was glass all over the place. I think the tow truck driver felt guilty because he was sweeping up the glass faster than I’ve ever seen it done before.

“I bought the car four days ago,” the man from the car said.

The man’s car was red and had paper plates. Both passenger side windows were shattered and both doors were damaged. The right front door was even missing a door handle. To add insult to injury, the ambulance had just driven away with his wife.

The man stood there looking at his car as he wondered what to do. He walked up to the passenger door and tried to close it. He slammed the door shut and it just bounced back like a ball because it wouldn’t stay closed.

“What am I going to do?”

“Well, you can’t drive it like that,” I said.

I then had an idea as I walked toward my patrol car. I carry duct tape with me in my traffic gear bag. The duct tape is for when I have to tape down a 300 foot tape measure in the street when I have a fatal accident. I actually call it the “duct tape of death” because it only comes out when something really bad happens.

I walked back up to the driver and showed him the duct tape as I asked, “Want to tape the door shut?”

He gave me a funny look and took the tape. He then got to work on his car. When he was done he drove away with a duct tape band-aid on his car. I just didn’t tell him I call it “The duct tape of death” though. I figured he didn’t need to know that.

Happy retirement Deputy

Posted on April 6, 2016 by Badge415

In May of 1990, my uncle Eddie (Ed to most people) graduated from the academy and became a Deputy with the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department. I missed his graduation because I had a final to take at school.

I remember the graduation party at my grandmother’s house after I finished my test at school. Eddie was wearing his uniform with his shiny deputy star on his chest as he posed for pictures with us. He was 4 years older than me and the first cop in our family. I was proud of him.

After he started working, he encouraged me to be a deputy. One day I went over his house and we had a long talk about police work. That conversation, along with another with a family neighbor, who worked for LAPD, pushed me toward a police career.

I can still picture where I sat in his house and how I left knowing the seed was planted for a career in law enforcement. That seed was later watered during a ride along with the Los Angeles Police Department that was set up through my mom’s neighbor.

I graduated from the Orange County Sheriff’s academy about 1 1/2 years after that conversation at Eddie’s house. It was a great moment to stand next to Eddie, who was there in his uniform. It was actually the only time we were in uniform together.

Now, after almost 26 years as a deputy, Eddie retired. It’s hard to believe he’s now a “retired cop.” Knowing he’s retired means I’m really not that far behind him, which is weird. I still have a ways to go, but the sun will set on my police career before I know it just like it did for Eddie.

Congrats on your retirement. Now, let’s go back to Maui.

The crazy stuff that flies out of cars

Posted on March 28, 2016 by Badge415

This cross was an errie sight in the middle of the street after one rollover hit and run crash.

You never know what you’re going to find in the street after a car has rolled over a couple of times.

The other night I was walking around a parking lot after a car had rolled over after hitting the side of a building. There was broken glass, car parts and fluid everywhere.

The damage told a story of a wild ride that would’ve looked spectacular had there been a video camera handy. Even the tow truck driver told me this was probably the worst car crash he had ever seen.

As he cleaned up, I walked around the path of destruction and saw a box of condoms lying among the debris. It was the wrong protection in this situation. The driver really needed a helmet instead.

While I was still at the scene, I thought about past collisions and all of the stuff that has come out of cars and been in the street when I got there. I wished I had taken more pictures.

I have no idea how the ice cream and the peppers got together. Notice the plastic bag stuck in the door. You never know what you’re going to see at a crash.

So far the craziest thing that has ever come out of a car was a guy’s finger. Yes, a finger. The driver was missing his finger after rolling over a couple of times. We later found it stuck to the pavement among the debris. It brings new meaning to the phrase, “He gave me the finger.”

You just can’t make this stuff up.

I’ll give you a break if…..

Posted on March 24, 2016 by Badge415

Night patrol

I’m always looking for ways to have fun on calls. Sometimes that includes quizzing people about their insurance company’s jingle or motto. It usually gets them to smile.

The other night I driving behind a car as we approached a red light when it made a right turn without stopping. After I stopped the car, I contacted the driver, who was in his 50s, and asked him for his license and insurance. The man handed me his license and his State Farm insurance paper. I asked him about the red light and he admitted to running it.

I was on my way to a call at the time and decided to give him a chance, but I also wanted to have a little fun at the same time.

“I’ll give you a break if you can tell me State Farm’s motto,” I said. The man shook his head and gave me a confused look. “You don’t know it?” I asked with a disappointed look.

“No,” he replied.

“It’s from the commercial,” I said, but he only gave me a blank look. Apparently State Farm needs to step up their marketing.

“How about Allstate? Do you know that one?” I asked.

He shook his head as he said, “No.”

“How about Geico?”

With a nervous laugh he said, “No.”

“Do you have a phone?”

“Yes,” the man said as he took it out to show me.

“Google it,” I said as I pointed to his phone. He opened up the Internet browser and I had him type in “State Farm like a good neighbor.”

A State Farm You Tube video came up at the top of the search. He clicked on it and a commercial started playing. The words “Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there” filled the car as the jingle played. The driver got a huge smile on his face as he recognized the commercial as he said, “Yeah!” He suddenly knew what I was talking about.

I handed his license back and let him go. The look on his face was hilarious after he figured it out. I bet he’ll think of me the next time a State Farm commercial comes on TV.

I bet he’ll think about me the next time he sees a red light too.

I’m working on my license

Posted on March 22, 2016 by Badge415

_DSC4559-2

The other day, I pulled up to a two-car crash where one vehicle rear ended another. I walked up to one of the drivers and asked him what happened. During the interview, he told me he rear ended the car in front of him.

I next asked, “Do you have a license?”

“No.”

“Do you mean you forgot it or you’ve never been issued one?”

“I’m illegal and I’m working on it.”

“They started handing them out over a year ago. What are you working on?”

“I needed paperwork and they also said I need glasses before I can get my license. I have an appointment tomorrow.”

It’s amazing how many people say they have an appointment at the DMV “tomorrow.” If I had a dollar for every time I’d heard that one.

“How are you going to take the test tomorrow if you don’t even have your glasses yet?”

The underage DUI driver seemed confused by my question. After a moment he finally said, “I’m going to Costco tomorrow before my test.”

Nice try, but I don’t think he’s too familiar with the prescription glasses process. He’ll have to work on planning things out better next time. He should start out with not drinking and driving while unlicensed. That would be a good start.

The missing piece of the puzzle

Posted on March 16, 2016 by Badge415

Witnesses never get the credit they deserve. As officers, we know the value of a person stopping to be a witness at a traffic collision or a crime scene. The information they provide can be invaluable and can truly be the missing piece of the puzzle.

The other night I handled a felony hit and run involving a DUI driver and a pedestrian, who later died at the hospital.

After being struck, the pedestrian was left in the middle of the street as the driver took off. There were a couple of witnesses who chased the suspect about a mile down the road to his home. They called the police and stood by for officers to arrive.

The suspect was later located and arrested. After I finished the call, I was grateful the witnesses had followed the suspect. If it hadn’t been for them, we might never have found the bad guy.

People don’t realize how important their information can be. Without them, it’s a puzzle that can never be solved.

My hat is off to those witnesses from that night. I’m glad you got involved to help. I’m sure the victim’s family would agree.

Just say no to crack

Posted on March 14, 2016 by Badge415

_DSC4881

The other day I was sent to a suspicious vehicle call in a residential neighborhood. The call said there was a man inside a red VW, who had been there for a few hours.

When I arrived, I saw a red VW Beatle parked along the curb. I ran the plate and learned it was registered out of the area. I got out of my car to look inside and was surprised to see a man sleeping.

He was stretched out in the backseat and hatchback area. He had a blanket covering him and he looked quite comfortable. I had no idea a VW Beatle had so much room. This couldn’t been a Volkswagen commercial.

Sleeping Beauty was in his mid-50s and at least 275lbs. I woke him up and told him the neighbors had called the police about the car and asked him where he lived. Tom said he lived at a half-way house not too far away from there.

“Why do you live at a half-way house?” I asked.

“It’s because I’m addicted to drugs,” he replied.

“When was the last time you did any drugs?”

“At noon. I went 50 days without doing meth, but I had a relapse today.”

I asked Tom if he could crawl to the front seat, thinking this was going to be an interesting feat on his part if he could do it. He started to go, but I wasn’t prepared for what I was going to see next.

He rolled over and tried to wiggle backwards toward the front seat. His shorts were hanging low in the back, partially exposing his rear end. I tried to shield my eyes from the half moon, but I was too slow and knew for sure I was going to have a nightmare that night.

At one point he got stuck between the seats with his ass in the air. It was like a horror movie, a flood and an alien invasion all rolled into one. As he paused to reevaluate his situation, I said, “Just say no to crack.”

Once he was finally in the driver seat we engaged in small talk about his drug use as I tried to forget the crack invasion I just experienced. That’s when he said something hilarious.

He told me, “I started smoking crack when I was 35 years old.”

Wow, I guess the phrase “Just say no to crack” didn’t mean much here.

Through small talk he told me he didn’t smoke crack anymore. He said he was strictly a meth user now. Thank goodness for that because he had enough to crack in his life.

“Do you have a meth pipe?”

“Yes, I do,” he relied.

“Where?”

The man then reached into the leg opening in his shorts toward his crotch. He dug around for a moment and pulled out a glass pipe. He held it up as he tried to hand it to me.

I looked at his crotch smelling meth pipe and said, “Um, let me get some gloves.”

When the day started I had no idea a butt crack Sleeping Beauty was going to pull a meth pipe from his crotch and hand it to me.

I guess I can cross that one off my bucket list.