I got to work on Wednesday and started making phone calls related to a hit and run report from the week before. I made three phone calls and had no luck. About 20 minutes later, I was still sitting at the desk when the phone rang.

I picked it up as I said, “Traffic.”

“Someone called me from this number.”

“Is this Juan?” I asked, since that was one of the people I called. The connection was terrible and I could barely hear him.

“Who?”

I told the man I was a police officer and what department I worked for. I asked, “Did you witness a collision last week?”

“Who is this?”

“I’m a police officer investigating a hit and run crash. Is this Juan?”

“What accident?”

“Did you leave your phone number with someone at a crash last week or were you involved in a collision?”

“Who?” Apparently, the connection was bad for him too. This was like trying to make a special order in the drive thru.

“This is the police department. I’m trying to find Juan?”

“What number were you calling?” he asked.

I told him I had called a couple of different numbers because I was trying to speak with witnesses. I then started reading phone numbers off to him as I asked if one of those was his.

“This is a new phone. I don’t know the number.”

“Were you in a parking lot last week when there was a crash?”

“My family was in an accident?”

All I could do was shake my head in frustration. Talking to him was like watching an Olympic downhill skier tumbling down the side of a mountain after he hit a couple of trees. It was just painful.

First he couldn’t hear me and now he thought his family was in a traffic collision. It was truly a “Can you hear me now” moment. Our conversation would’ve made a great cell phone commercial.

You just can’t make this stuff up.