It’s always entertaining to see a person make a complete fool of themselves after drinking too much. The other night, I pulled up to a single vehicle collision on a residential street. The driver, who had been drinking, was speaking with officers. His girlfriend was standing off to the side with another officer.
As I walked up, there was one thing that stood out about them. Their emotions were like night and day. He was calm and respectful. She on the other hand, was a bloody hot mess that reminded me of a train wreck.
I’m not talking about a regular train wreck. I’m talking about a multi-casualty train wreck with hazardous materials and farm animals on board.
The woman was wearing a dress and had dried blood covering her left leg from her toes all the way up the thigh. It wasn’t just a little bit of blood. It was a lot of blood.
Her right leg was also covered in blood, but not as bad as the “Friday the 13th” thing that she had going on with her left leg. She looked straight out of a 1980s horror movie.
She had blood smeared across her neck with a small flap of skin peeled back and hanging just under her chin. She had a ton of snot running out of her nose onto her upper lip. This look was completed by 20 minutes of non-stop crying as she asked to stand next to her boyfriend.
At first she claimed she had fallen, but she later admitted to being in a fight with her sister. That explained the flap of skin on her neck where she must’ve been clawed during the fight. She also told us she wasn’t in the vehicle when the crash occurred, but we learned that was a lie too.
Just in case, I asked the woman if her boyfriend had done this to her. Her face turned serious as she looked over at him and said, “I’d tell you if that motherfucker did this to me.” I almost laughed at the way she said it.
She then went back to crying and sobbing as she said, “I want to stand next to him.” Talk about a mood swing. At one point, she told an officer she needed a hug. She looked like Frankenstein with her arms sticking straight out as she walked toward the cop for her hug.
I wondered if her boyfriend secretly hoped he’d get arrested just to get a night away from her. Later on she said, “I’m not drunk.”
There’s one thing for sure about this particular call. You just can’t beat watching a drunk and bloody woman trying to get a hug from a cop at 2:30AM. It was priceless.
By the way, she refused help from the fire department.