The girl with perfect glasses


A few weeks ago I was in a store with my daughter when she told me she wanted to buy clear glasses. I asked her why she wanted those. She said, “They’re cute.”

Well, they weren’t that cute for $12. As we walked to the car,  I told her those glasses reminded me of a story from work. After I got done telling them the story, both of my kids shook their heads in amazement.

One night it was raining when I was dispatched to a hit and run collision in which the victim was chasing the suspect. The victim didn’t know where she was at and we couldn’t find her.

The call then got really confusing when someone else called 911 related to the collision. Dispatch got a call from some guy who said he was a passenger from the suspect vehicle, but he was now a passenger in the victim vehicle. He didn’t know where he was either.


The call was so confusing I finally told dispatch I was going to park at Target and the victim could find me since we couldn’t locate her. A few minutes later she showed up alone. A carload of her friends also showed up because she called them.

The victim told me she was rear ended by a car that took off. She chased after the car until it drove into a cul-de-sac. Once in the cul-de-sac, the car stopped and a male passenger got out. The suspect vehicle then took off again, but left the male there.

The male ran up to her car and got into the passenger seat and told her to chase after the suspect, which she did.

At that point, there were two people in the victim vehicle calling 911.

During the chase they lost the suspect vehicle and the guy told her to stop. He got out of the car and took off too. Of course, she had no idea where she left him because she was lost herself. We never found that guy. It was probably better that way. If he needed the cops he would’ve called back.

While I was talking with her, I noticed that the lenses on her glasses were really clear. My lenses were spotted from working in the rain that night, but her lenses were in perfect condition. They were almost too perfect.

“Do you have lenses in your glasses?” I asked.

“No,” she said it with a straight face.

After an awkward silence I asked, “Why would you wear glasses with no lenses?”

“I have a fat face. They make me look thinner.”

I actually busted up laughing in front of her. I couldn’t help it. This was just a weird call. You can’t make this stuff up.

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